[Moms Unfiltered] Queen of the Slashes (with Shadraila James-Ray)
#36

[Moms Unfiltered] Queen of the Slashes (with Shadraila James-Ray)

Zuryna Livermore: This episode of
Operations Unfiltered is brought to you

by Clear Minds Consulting and Counseling.

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So visit Psychology today and search
Raven Anderson in Baltimore, Maryland

welcome back to Operations Unfiltered, the
podcast that takes you behind the scenes

of influencer and talent management.

I'm your host and your favorite
marketing project manager, girly Zuryna.

Today's episode is a moms unfiltered
edition featuring a very special guest.

Family friend and self-proclaimed
Queen of the slashes.

I'm talking about Shadraila.

James Ray, she's a wife, a mom, a
cheer coach, an entrepreneur, a makeup

artist, and a Mary Kay salesperson.

Are you tired yet?

Because I am.

This conversation hit home for me,
not just because I love her real bad,

but because I know what it feels like
to juggle all the hats while still

showing up as a present and loving mom.

This is a feel good episode,
and I hope you end up loving

Shadraila just as much as I do.

So without further ado, let's get
into this operations unfiltered,

mom's Unfiltered edition.

Thank you so much for joining me on
this special episode of Moms Unfiltered.

I love talking to moms because I truly
feel like they are the project managers

of their life, and I have a very
special guest, Shadraila James Ray.

You're a wife, a mom, a serial
entrepreneur, but I feel like I can't

tell your story better than you.

So for all the listeners,
introduce yourself to us.

How are you?

Welcome.

Shadraila: I am great, hi everybody.

Body.

I am Shadraila James Ray.

I call myself the queen
of the slashes Mom.

Zuryna Livermore: that's right.

Shadraila: Mom slash coach slash
entrepreneur slash slash slash slash.

Zuryna Livermore: You know what?

When I read all the things that you
do, I got tired I don't know how you

keep up and do all the things, but
take us through a day in your life.

What does it look like?

Juggling all the things that you do?

Shadraila: I just make it work.

I mean, of course the, the morning
starts with getting the kids together

and we all know how crazy that could
be, especially with a 7-year-old girl.

Zuryna Livermore: Yes.

Shadraila: Since Carson is 13
now, he's doing his own thing.

He gets up on his own for the
most part, but dealing with,

Zuryna Livermore: get there.

You know

Shadraila: I know

Zuryna Livermore: three.

It is a lot.

It's a production every

Shadraila: it is, it's still a production
at seven because we may not wanna wear the

shoes that Mama said she needs to wear.

We may need five more minutes to sleep.

We, we had a long day the
previous day, so I'm not ready.

So it's still a dramatic episode.

Every single morning, but hey,
and once I drop them off my

day can include so many things.

Helping my grandparents coming home to do
shirts, having hair appointments lined up,

getting cheer routines together here in
the living room, getting my one two step

on making Mary Kay calls annoying people.

Hey, you gonna get this product or not?

So, I mean,

Zuryna Livermore: add

Shadraila: just everything.

Zuryna Livermore: one more on your list.

You supposed to be creating content,
and I'm gonna get on you later,

but, mm, I didn't hear you say
nothing about creating no content.

Putting

Shadraila: Listen, listen.

Zuryna Livermore: up.

Shadraila: So I do try to create content.

I do need to do, uh, a lot more,
but I have, I've been a lot better

because I didn't never think I
would be to this point where I'd

be creating content and posted it.

Zuryna Livermore: And I
love seeing you do it.

You know, your personality is so bubbly,
and I tell you all the time, that is

what's gonna help propel you forward
even past what you're already doing,

because you are wearing a lot of hats.

I know you're a sports mom.

You have a football player,
you're the cheer coach.

Now that's a lot.

I already know, your regular days
are hectic, but tell me what game

day looks like or a competition day.

How is that different than
your regular everyday life?

Shadraila: So, previously, carson
played football for the team that

I actually coached for, so it was
much easier then because the days he

practiced and the days I practiced
were the same and the game days and

cheer days were pretty much the same.

But now since he's in middle school,
it's a little bit different because

the game days are the days that I
actually have cheer practice on.

Zuryna Livermore: Ugh.

Shadraila: So it makes me make a decision.

It's like, okay, this week do I go see
my son and support him because he's

used to me never missing anything.

So do I go see him or do I go,
you know, go to cheer practice?

So I've had to split my time, these
past few weeks I was not able to see

him because we had cheer competition

so I had to put all of my
energy towards the competition.

So we've been practicing really
hard, uh, but I definitely

have to split my time and it's.

Very much so hard, but hey,

Zuryna Livermore: talk

Shadraila: do what I gotta do.

Zuryna Livermore: 'Cause I know
for me, even missing stuff, I cry.

I'm like, she's three.

Part of me

Shadraila: Right.

Zuryna Livermore: remember,
but then I feel bad.

I'm like, I'm gonna
remember that I missed it.

So

Shadraila: You definitely.

Zuryna Livermore: how
you deal with that mom.

Guilt?

Shadraila: You definitely do, and a lot
of people always say, they've told me

over the years, oh, you do too much.

You don't have to be at everything.

Yes, I do.

Yes I do.

I brought them here, and whatever
they involved in, I'm gonna

support them wholeheartedly.

I'm gonna support my kids
wholeheartedly no matter what.

So if I can't go to a game, I'm
gonna make sure Carson has support.

So the games that I've missed, Carson has
had at least eight family members there.

Zuryna Livermore: Oh, I love it.

You.

Shadraila: I'm gonna make sure my baby
has the support, you know, but it, I do

feel guilty not being able to attend.

But then again, summer's also
a cheerleader, so I have to

make sure, even though I'm the
coach, she is a cheerleader, so

I have to support both sides.

Zuryna Livermore: You guys are such
a strong family support system.

Shadraila: yes.

Zuryna Livermore: all on my feed.

I see Carson, I'm like, I'm there too.

'cause everybody posted.

I'm like, yes.

I love it.

Shadraila: Yes, yes.

So I'm definitely glad to have a village
because it is really hard out here.

Without one, I can definitely
do that hard without.

Zuryna Livermore: you
preaching to the choir.

My village there.

I'm trying.

It's so, it's, it's a lot.

That cross country move is a lot and

Shadraila: I understand.

I understand.

I couldn't imagine living somewhere for
so many years and be like, you know what?

We just gonna leave.

Uh, it's a hard situation.

Zuryna Livermore: That's why
people think I'm crazy when I

say I'm gonna be bi coastal.

I am.

I'm definitely gonna have a home in
Houston and I'm gonna be here because

we have, it's like we have two bases.

But I love

Shadraila: It's possible.

Zuryna Livermore: it

Shadraila: possible.

Zuryna Livermore: it is.

Especially in this day and age of digital

Shadraila: Is.

Zuryna Livermore: which is why I'm
on you so much post this content,

girl, you need to post this content.

Shadraila: Yes.

Yes

Zuryna Livermore: back

Shadraila: I do.

Zuryna Livermore: Back to Sports Carson.

He's in middle school,
he's the football player.

What position does he play?

Shadraila: He's playing
quarterback and middle linebacker.

Zuryna Livermore: Oh wow.

Shadraila: Right,

Zuryna Livermore: the coins.

I know

Shadraila: right.

Come on,

Zuryna Livermore: Mom,

Shadraila: come on.

Come on.

The next Travis Hunter and Deon Sand.

Come on.

Zuryna Livermore: Hello.

But speaking of that, we are in the
era of NIL deals and kids being able

to make money off their name, image,
and likeness from their phones.

Do you see that as an opportunity, or do
you see something that's gonna make things

a little bit more complicated for him?

His love of the sports,
even for you as a parent.

Shadraila: I see it as both.

It, it is definitely a huge opportunity
for him and the family, , with

additional income, but also, I
look at it like the kids have to

understand that there is still growth.

Like, okay, I didn't make it all the way.

So there is, this is
just a stepping stone.

And some of the kids have to realize
that because some of them get a NIL

deal and their whole attitude changes
and the love for the game is like

out the door 'cause I'm rich already,

Zuryna Livermore: Yeah.

Shadraila: you know?

So it's, it's like a

Zuryna Livermore: it.

You can

Shadraila: right.

It's,

Zuryna Livermore: It's like,

Shadraila: you know.

Zuryna Livermore: they excited, like,

Shadraila: Right, and you have the
ones that's hearts is really in it.

And it is like, okay, I got a
deal no matter what, this is the,

this is my heart, so I'm gonna be
here and I'm gonna be all in it.

And then you have the ones
that's like, I got the money

already, so it doesn't matter.

Zuryna Livermore: Yeah.

Now you're in Texas where the
NIL laws are kind of confusing.

Do you ever find yourself trying
to decode that to understand

what, what you're able to do?

Or are you just like, I'm over it
And if so, based on your research,

what would you tell lawmakers
about the NI L Laws in Texas?

Shadraila: To be honest, I've
probably read up on it just maybe

a few times, but not too much.

I do hope that the guys here
in Texas are able to go ahead

and start getting those deals.

That will be amazing.

Zuryna Livermore: Mm-hmm.

Shadraila: I mean, people's making
money off of everything else.

Why not?

These guys are making
money off of their talent.

'cause even though it is just
what is this high school?

If they're still getting injured, they're
still being pressured to win games, so why

not be able to compensate them, you know?

Zuryna Livermore: Yeah, that would help
offset something for the parents too.

I mean,

Shadraila: Correct.

Zuryna Livermore: for
cleats and, and pads.

Why not gimme a

Shadraila: All the latest gear they
want, I want this fancy helmet with,

the great ones are between like 600
to, you know, over a thousand dollars.

So it's like, okay mom, I want this
helmet, mom, I want these $200 cleats

and, but I want these just for the game
and I want these just for practice,

and I want this special mouthpiece.

Zuryna Livermore: You, the, you, the
queen of the slashes, you ha house.

I'm gonna pay for all of this.

Oh, so, so at the end of this we're
gonna say, book your appointments.

I'm gonna put all of your links on
here because Carson needs helmets

and, and summer needs cheer, bows

Shadraila: Mm-hmm.

Zuryna Livermore: things.

Shadraila: Yes.

Zuryna Livermore: Okay.

So back to operations.

You clearly are the project
manager of your household.

Now, are you a paper and pen kind of girl?

Do you have a calendar?

How do you keep yourself organized
and know that you're supposed to

be at this place at three o'clock
and this place at five o'clock?

Shadraila: I use my calendar on my phone.

I have to put everything on my calendar.

If it's not on there, it doesn't exist.

Zuryna Livermore: I know that's right.

Shadraila: It does not
exist because I will forget.

I will forget.

Like today, I have a full day.

Literally my day started from
the time I dropped Carson off.

I had a hair appointment right after that.

Had to do some hair, had to go ahead
and jump on here, and I have a few

other things to do, so it's like, whew.

I have to just get it all down.

I can't do pen and paper.

I try to, but I don't carry that with me.

My phone is in my hand all the time,
so it's better for me to put it on

my calendar, on my phone or set a
quick reminder on my phone so I can

get it done because like I said, if
it's not there, it doesn't exist.

Zuryna Livermore: If you didn't
write it, it didn't happen.

Shadraila: It.

Zuryna Livermore: telling people.

If it didn't happen, I totally love that.

But what I'm hearing is you're so booked
and busy, do you take care of yourself?

What does self care look like for you?

Because how, first of all, you don't have
no time, so, but what does that look like?

Shadraila: I don't, I don't Ooh.

Self-care.

Self-care.

Zuryna Livermore: if you gotta
think this hard, that means

you're not doing enough self

Shadraila: I'm not, to be
honest, I'm really not.

I'm really not.

And some of the things that I wanna do.

Sometimes financially it's a struggle,
but hey, you know, so literally I'm

pretty simple having enough time to
kick back, eat a few snacks, or watch

my, my shows, catch up, my shows.

I, I love it.

It's like the older I get,
it's like, oh, forget outside.

Zuryna Livermore: Outside costs too much.

I'm Finn

Shadraila: Yeah.

No, it does, especially here in
Houston, it definitely costs a lot.

So just kicking back getting
my nails and feet done here and

there and few massages in, that's,
that's kind of my, my self-care.

I don't do it enough, but yeah, I do it.

I can.

Zuryna Livermore: you, you
don't, but what are some shows

that are on your must have list?

I know for me, I'm, I'm binging Reasonable
doubt or trying to, but that is a

Shadraila: Girl, you need to catch up.

I love reasonable doubts.

I love reasonable doubts.

Few of my favorites.

Reasonable Doubt.

Uh, Zima, I love the new Law and Orders.

Zuryna Livermore: Oh yes, the uh,

Shadraila: Yes.

Zuryna Livermore: or you
like organized crime?

Shadraila: I like, I like the
new, episodes of SVU and also just

the regular one with, it doesn't
have a additional, it just says.

Zuryna Livermore: the regular one.

I know what you're

Shadraila: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

So that one

Zuryna Livermore: girly and.

Shadraila: and now I've
recently gotten into suits.

Zuryna Livermore: Ooh,

Shadraila: Mm-hmm.

Zuryna Livermore: to get into suits.

I'm, I don't know, maybe I have to have
it with a new lens, but I'm just like,

it's not moving fast enough for me.

I don't know.

I'm gonna try it again.

Sharay.

I'm gonna try, I'm gonna let
you know I'm gonna report back.

Shadraila: Report back.

I'm, I'm freshly into it.

I'm freshly into it, you know.

Zuryna Livermore: love that.

That's a good, uh, roundup.

Are you into the Housewives at all?

Shadraila: definitely into the,
I watch Atlanta and Potomac.

Those are the two,

Zuryna Livermore: ones,

Shadraila: yeah,

Zuryna Livermore: got you.

We everybody

Shadraila: those are the two that I watch.

Yeah.

Zuryna Livermore: I call it my numbing
entertainment, especially because I feel

like when you're a parent and you're
an entrepreneur like you, you're, I get

decision overload, decision fatigue.

So I'd rather turn on a show like that
and just let my brain turn to mush.

'cause that's one time I
don't have to make a decision.

So

Shadraila: right.

Zuryna Livermore: now you also mentioned
you're a Mary Kay consultant, which

I consider like one of the ultimate
entrepreneurs, but what made you

decide to do that, to be your own boss?

Shadraila: Well, I was my own
boss before Mary Kay, but.

Zuryna Livermore: Ooh, cl it.

Shadraila: So when it came down to Mary
Kay because I'm so into makeup, a lot of

people just like, they would ask me for
years, like, oh, you should get into it.

You should get into it.

And I was like, eh, no,
don't worry about it.

And uh, finally, after my mother-in-law
and another family member got into

it, they was like, you should try it.

So I actually got into it, and I
really love the sisterhood of Mary Kay.

Zuryna Livermore: Mm-hmm.

Shadraila: People will look at it
and be like, oh, it's just a bunch

of people trying to sell some stuff.

It is really a, a good sisterhood.

They are very encouraging.

Maybe you could sell a dollar
and they'd be like, woo.

You know, it is really encouraging, just
some people behind you always encouraging

you saying you can do what you got it.

You know, everybody don't have
that in your day-to-day life.

Zuryna Livermore: Yeah,

Shadraila: know, you don't have
that in your day-to-day life.

So that's one huge thing
I love about Mary Kay.

And people have this myth that
it's just all about makeup.

Zuryna Livermore: yeah.

Shadraila: this face

Zuryna Livermore: Period.

Shadraila: and products are bone.

Okay.

Zuryna Livermore: card is not

Shadraila: Okay.

Zuryna Livermore: It's not declining.

Shadraila: It's not, it's not.

So, you know, and I was like,
that's part of the reason I wanted

to just come without makeup today.

'cause everybody thinks,
okay, Mary Kay is just makeup.

I don't wanna use their makeup.

No, it's not just makeup, you know.

Zuryna Livermore: And that you,
there's a lot of multi-step skincare

products, which I love, again,

Shadraila: Men and women and teenagers.

Yes.

So we serve everybody.

Zuryna Livermore: out of it.

Decision overload.

No, they already build it for you.

And so if people wanted
to buy specifically from

you, where would they go?

How would they tap in?

Of course, I'm gonna put all your
information in our show notes, but how

can they tap in to all the things that
you're doing as far as like Mary Kay, you

mentioned you do hair and makeup in the
Houston area, for those of you who are

wondering, but how can they get tapped in?

Shadraila: Y'all see how
she just added makeup?

So many people want me to do makeup.

Zuryna Livermore: She does,

Shadraila: do,

Zuryna Livermore: though

Shadraila: I do my own makeup and
maybe a few family members if they

ask me, but I have not necessarily
tapped into the makeup business yet.

Yes, uh, but I do have a Mary Kay website.

I have my TikTok, I have Instagram,
I have Facebook for all, for all

of my businesses, you know, can
hit me up for whatever you need.

Whatever you need.

I do shirts as well.

I do all kinds of crafts.

Random crafts.

Hey people.

Zuryna Livermore: You made my,
my post wedding shirts and I

definitely would be placing
another order for some more shirts.

But

Shadraila: Yes.

Zuryna Livermore: thing that I was
like, we're gonna talk about this.

You, you said you don't create
content, but now you are slowly

getting more in front of the camera.

You are this coach, this lovely
person outside of Instagram

and outside of social media.

So do you consider yourself a
content creator or an influencer?

Shadraila: I would say I'm
building into a content creator.

I wouldn't necessarily say an influencer
yet because I don't have, I don't feel

like I have enough following for it to
be an influencer, but, uh, I'm on my way.

Zuryna Livermore: Oh no, that's right.

And you'll

Shadraila: Hold on.

Zuryna Livermore: I personally, my
advice for you is to keep sharing

your day in the life content.

Keep sharing.

I know it's annoying, but put your
camera up while you driving to school,

while you taking your kids at practice,
because I think that helps sell who

you are as the person, the brand,
and it just connects the story so.

My shameless plug, if you don't
hear nothing else from me today,

get you a tripod and set it up.

Shadraila: Right, right.

Zuryna Livermore: be checking in
like Drea, where is the content?

You know?

But no, seriously, for the moms who
are doing what you do or trying to

do at all, what's one piece of advice
or encouragement that you would share

with them when they have those moments
of, I can't do it, or I'm struggling,

what would you say to them?

Shadraila: Keep God first.

Okay.

And lean.

Lean on him because we always trying
to figure it out and we can't.

We, we, you're not gonna
get everything right.

You're not gonna figure it all out.

Lean on God, pray a whole lot.

Cover your family.

Cover your kids, and do what you can.

Spread your time out and don't,
don't get overwhelmed with

everything at the same time.

And I know that's hard, you know, but

Zuryna Livermore: you,

Shadraila: we.

Zuryna Livermore: at me?

It's okay.

Shadraila: Yes.

So, uh, just while, just, just lean on
his understanding and just pray about it.

Do what you can for yourself and
your kids and keep up the good work.

So I.

Zuryna Livermore: I know that's right.

Keep up the good work, period.

Ah, okay.

This was so great.

I appreciate you for joining me.

I really wanna give moms that
little motivational minute

and I feel like you did that.

You're an everyday mom,
but you're doing so much.

Oh, and tell us what place do
y'all come in at the competition?

'cause I saw it.

I know that's right.

And what's next for you?

For the cheerleaders, your son,
your family, your business.

Give me a little bit of a forecast.

What, what?

What do

Shadraila: Oh, right, okay.

As far as cheer, homecoming is November
so it's like now the competition is over.

Coach has to jump straight
into homecoming mode.

So I gotta make all the cheer moms and
get all of that good stuff ready for them.

I gotta get the crafting again.

As.

Zuryna Livermore: what she's
saying is sponsors, if you

Shadraila: Hey, hey,
sponsor, sponsor, sponsor.

Please, please, please.

That would help a whole lot.

Also with my family, we just, uh.

Carson's still into football.

He has a couple more games this season.

So I've made it my business
to attend the last two.

I don't care what else is
going on, I will be there.

And yeah, just, just that.

And my husband, let me not leave him out.

Okay.

Zuryna Livermore: I'm
gonna interview him next.

He

Shadraila: Okay.

Zuryna Livermore: T Ray

Shadraila: Hard,
hardworking music trapping,

you know.

Zuryna Livermore: right.

Get a coin.

Shadraila: and he is always in the mix.

He's the head coach for football
and of course he's there to

support the kids all the time.

So we are juggling it all.

You can do it too.

Zuryna Livermore: I love that so
much it's, it is beautiful to see a

black family, a intact black family

Shadraila: Yes, because they paint
us to be a ratchet all the time and

not together in the daddy's missing.

Zuryna Livermore: No, the daddy is very
present and there for the children.

Amen.

Okay.

But you guys are truly an inspiration
and I'm grateful to get to share

your story even if it's just
a little bit with the public.

So I'm excited for you and I'm
excited to keep up with all the

things and I'll be home soon.

Shadraila: Come on,
we'll have gumbo ready.

Come on.

Come on.

Zuryna Livermore: Y'all
say that I want mine.

Yes.

Don't make it for my daughter, Zaya.

It is mine.

I want my own separate one.

Shadraila: All right.

Zuryna Livermore: Uhuh.

she gonna make her hair appointment.

I'm gonna call

Shadraila: Okay, girl.

Come

Zuryna Livermore: Yes, please.

Uh, but thank you so much for joining me.

This was a great mom's unfiltered
tune in everybody to all the things

that rela has 'cause it's amazing.

It's amazing.